a sesame seed...

Well, day two of knowing I'm pregnant. I have been having cramps - I read that's normal, but its funny because the last whole last week I thought I was going to start my cycle because I was having cramps, and I thought that was strange because I don't think I ever had cramps before I started.

I have also been nauseated. I keep wondering if it is in my head because it just started today which was after I found out, but then I remember Sunday I woke up feeling sick. I wrote it off because that happens sometimes if my blood sugar goes off in the night. Anyway, I keep trying to talk myself out of it because I don't want to be sick, and I don't want Brian to think that it is in my head now that I know I'm pregnant.


Apparently, I am in my 5th week today so my baby is around the size of a sesame seed. I have a couple of apps on my iPod touch to walk me through this... it's been fun. :-) Sometimes I think, "well, no turning back now!" that's right after I think, "This is really happening, we are having a baby!"

I am getting more tired. I just have less energy to do stuff. It would explain earlier this week when I had a really hard time getting started on tasks.

Today I talked to the baby. (side note: everytime I think of the baby I think of it as a boy, but I wonder if it is a girl because I have been leaning towards purple things lately) I had a broccoi, ham and cheese scrambled egg and one piece of toast for breakfast, but apparently something had gone wrong because when I got out of my Bryant Tec meeting today my blood sugar was over 300. I felt really bad because I realized that I should have checked my blood sugar sooner and I imagined this organism submersed in a sugary substance trying to develop in a soffocating syrup. So then I said, "Oh no! I'm so sorry baby!"

Anyway, I am exhausted, but I have one more thing to say. Last weekend at the McCann's I had mentioned having little kids around because we were discussing a dog, and the new house having more room to expand our family easier. Every time I mentioned it, it would sound like we knew we were actually expecting, but we didn't. So now I wonder if when I announce this to my in-laws they are going to look back at this weekend and think, "I knew it!" and then we come back and say, "We didn't." Just thoughts...